Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
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