omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Randomize
