I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Randomize
