..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
