Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize