you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
