Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
