So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
I smell like Dick and happiness
Randomize
