plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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