I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
Bring me that man meat
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Randomize
