Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize
