At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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