I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize