She announced her abortion via fbk
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Randomize
