He is such a slut. More and more my type.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
