Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
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