Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
