i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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