you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Dear god my vagina.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
