Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
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