sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
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