You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
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