It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Randomize