why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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