you guys were way drunker than both of me
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
