now i know why i became what i already was.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Randomize