some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
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