Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Randomize
