A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Randomize
