Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
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