I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
the night ended with taco bell and tears
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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