Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
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