What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Randomize
