so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
