at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
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