I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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