aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
