Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
you didnt know i had herpes?
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
