Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
well I can't set my house on fire every night
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
