I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
