She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
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