I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
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