I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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