i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
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