If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Randomize
