I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
if i died would you start the facebook group?
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Randomize
