The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
my sisters under your porch take her home
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
