it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
we're making bets on your personal life
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
