we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
