I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Randomize