you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
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